Do you want to be loved?

This morning, I woke up refreshed, and excited that I had 7 full hours of sleep. Being in the 3rd trimester of pregnancy, that is not only an oddity, but a rarity! I got out of bed, freshened up, and headed to the kitchen. I made fresh blueberry muffins, coffee, set the table, made my 2 school-aged children lunch, and even had time to make my husband lunch....all before waking them up! Once I woke them up, we all got ready, came to kitchen, began to enjoy breakfast and my husband calls out, "Hey, do the kids have time to watch President Obama receive the Nobel Peace Prize?" At first, I said, "no," but then I changed my mind and let them watch the last 15 minutes. It was a good discussion point as none of us had ever actually watched the ceremony.

Afterwards, we finished up, headed to school, and dropped them off. All in the midst of last minute yelling to "hurry up before we're late."

"Those are my sneakers, take them off."
"Mom, he's wearing my sneakers and won't give them back to me."
"They're not her's, they're mine." yadda yadda yadda.

You see, the kids have to wear black sneakers to school. They have the same ones, but they differ by one shoe size.
"Son, take her shoes off, put your's on, and let's go!" We arrive to school, now calmed and ready to begin the day.

On the way home, I heard someone say, "Most people who are mean, sarcastic, or continually say critical words really just want to be loved and don't know how." The first thought that came to me was, well, maybe, but sometimes they're just mean and could care less. The second thought was it's true. Those words then pierced my heart and I had to examine the words I used or my actions this morning and how closely they aligned with one side or the other.

Sometimes, people have never had a positive example of what love is and how to love. They just don't know how to do it. As creatures, we oftentimes lean toward negative behavior because that is what has been modeled. Negative being sarcasm, think the worst, self-destructive behavior, lying, sharp remarks, rebuffing kindness, etc. There are many times where it totally rubs us the wrong way to accept those who are different than ourselves, or even those who do things in ways we just wouldn't do.

How does this all play out during this Christmas season when we're all supposed to be jolly, happy, filled with joy, and thanks? What happens when we come across that disgruntled employee; or that person who cuts us off in traffic; or nearly knocks us over as we're walking and then has the audacity to yell at us for being in their way? Is our response to return the gestures or words? Do we just smile on the outside and fume on the inside? Do we have sympathy and just keep doing what we're doing? What is your response? How are you going to show someone else love?

This morning, I showed my family love by making a special breakfast. I showed frustration by yelling at the kids for nearly making us late because of switching shoes. I showed love by apologizing, hugging, kissing, and saying encouraging words. I yelled at the driver who cut me off and nearly made me hit another car while driving. I smiled at the person who walked as slow as possible to cross the street. I had ups and downs in my "love walk" this morning. I agree there are things I need to work on, but it prompted me to think about what I heard. Did I consider that the other driver who sped through the light and nearly hit me was late, or maybe got horrifying news of a loved one who was in the hospital? Did I consider that there may have been something medically wrong with the slow walker and they could go no faster? Everyone has their own reasons for why they behave the way in which they do. We are only responsible for our own actions, not necessarily judging the actions of others.

So I invite all of you to consider the other possibilities and think outside of your own situations. Think how can I show kindness and model love today? What one action can I do or word can I say when someone is not being as kind as possible? It's a hard assignment, but when we model love, it's a seed that breaks down the barrier to others hatred, hurt, anger, bitterness, depression, or negative situation. Try it and see what happens.

If you have a positive story, please post it here so we all can laugh out loud, rejoice with you, and enjoy our families and lives today.

Yellow Blurry Lines

It's been way to long since I last wrote, but alas, I finally remembered to be inspired to take some time away from life's little nuances.

As I drove home from picking up the kids today, I noticed that traffic was unusually slow in one area. Assuming it was because of the four foot wide dimple holes or the six inch high raised and cracked streets, I didn't think too much about it. However, when I finally got to the main area down the street, I noticed the big yellow arrow telling all the drivers in the right lane to merge with the left lane. Again, I was curious, but let my lingering thoughts and kids' conversation take over my mind. It wasn't until I drove past the arrow that I saw three men walking along side a machine making yellow lines down the middle of the road that I was taken aback.

I was a little upset to say the least. How can the City of New Orleans waste the tax payer money with man hours and yellow blurry lines in the street when the potholes, dimples, and raised asphalt are in dire need of repair? How can they lose sight of the bigger issue that causes accidents; in lieu of the minor cosmetic changes being made? Yes, there were existing blurry lines which drivers saw, or inadvertently knew were there, regardless of the painted yellow lines now being made.

Immediately, my common sense ceased my thoughts and I had to realize that as a parent, I can be like the City! I can lose sight of the many wonderful things I desire to do with my children because of my focus on their immediate behavior lapses or even my own issues. I focus on the now instead of the bigger picture of the future. I choose to forsake what I truly desire to see happen in an effort to quell the concerns of now.

How many of us out there can admit to losing sight of what's important in the lives of our families? I stand up first and admit that I've taken my eyes off of the prize and settled for something that is more tangible that I can touch and feel. It is not necessarily wrong, but it is something that I know I have compromised upon. However, I make a stance right here and now to not compromise on my goals, visions, and dreams for my family. I vow to keep my eyes focused on building a great future through making memories. I will not look at one test with a poor grade and yell at my child. I will not yell for not jumping to attention the moment I request it. I will focus on character building traits that will ultimately help my children to be responsible, compassionate, helpful, resourceful people who always strive to do their best in every situation. In essence, I will fix the streets first (keep my eyes on the bigger prize) and not make yellow lines instead (immediate concerns of now)!

Until next time, ponder that thought, laugh out loud and love on your family today.